Archive for November, 2010

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So Much to Be Thankful For

November 18, 2010

 

The 3 Sisters (from left) Mary Peckham, Joane Garcia-Colson, Fredilyn Sison

Had anyone asked us—the 3 Sisters, Mary, Fredi and I—ten years ago what we would be doing today, I doubt that any of us would have predicted that we would be part of a partnership created to help people, particularly trial lawyers, realize their full potential. And yet, that is exactly where we are.

The three of us met ten years ago when we were part of an organization that provides continuing legal education programs to trial lawyers. Through this experience, we were exposed to psychodrama. As many of you know who have read this blog, psychodrama is an action method, a way to communicate deeply and meaningfully. It is the exploration of the truth through dramatic action. A psychodrama not only brings out the humanity of people, but also the universal stories and truths that connect us all.

Psychodrama can be therapeutic as it gives participants the opportunity to explore events from their lives to gain greater understanding of the self and to begin to heal old wounds. Psychodrama also empowers those who experience it to become more fully present in the here and now, enjoy greater spontaneity, realize their own potential, and create the life they each want to lead.

Over the years, each of us dedicated ourselves to doing as much of our own personal work as possible so that we can better know who we are, how we came to be that way and what we can do to shape our future. Our journey has not always been easy and each of us has traveled psychodramatically through many painful moments from the past. With each passing experience, we grew as human beings and as lawyers.  By learning more about ourselves, we are more able to understand others.  Over the last ten to twelve years, we have shared our skill and knowledge of psychodrama with other lawyers across the country and helped them to discover and learn to use the tools of this powerful method to represent their clients. We have exposed them to ideas and techniques that can assist them both in preparing and presenting their clients’ stories in trial. Teaching at various workshops improved our skill and stimulated our creativity. These experiences also increased our desire to develop our skill and proficiency in using the psychodramatic method to help others.  After years of training and study, each of us was certified as a practitioner (CP) of psychodrama by the American Board of Examiners. Mary and I have continued our training and hope to soon be certified as trainers (TEP’s). Fredi, in her inimitable way, said, “Basta!”  The three of us continue to go to workshops, often together.  Psychodrama continues to help us each individually and provides many tools we call upon and employ both personally and professionally.  To say that our lives have been enhanced as a result of our exposure to psychodrama would be an understatement.

From left - Mary Peckham, Fredilyn Sison, Joane Garcia-Colson

In the mid 2000’s, we began to brainstorm ideas for working together, for taking our creative ideas and sharing them with others. Originally, our thoughts were simply playful, more fantastical than practical:  a 3 Sisters coffee house, bookstore, stand-up comedy and yarn shop. As we grew as people, our ideas grew. The idea of a Trial Boot Camp for Women took shape after several troubling experiences throughout the years. Two of us attended one program as part of the teaching staff where our male colleagues introduced the other male faculty as talented and skilled trial lawyers but ignored the many accomplishments of the female staff members. One of our friends, a courageous lawyer who does employment law, got up and started to introduce the talented lawyers she knew and named the women attorney staff in the room.  Other female professionals we have talked to over the years have had similar experiences and often feel invisible at seminars and workshops. Issues unique to women are rarely acknowledged, much less addressed with any sort of depth or understanding.  And so, we conceived the idea of a program where women could come together to work on issues unique to them and to meet and build relationships with other female trial lawyers.

In the late summer of 2009, Fredi and I began talking about making our idea of creating a program specifically for women trial lawyers a reality.  Our concept was to develop and design a program to nurture female trial lawyers and help them develop their own voice, recognize their unique talents as women and bring them into the courtroom. In September 2009, Mary, Fredi, Lynne Bratcher and I traveled to Colorado, where we brainstormed and outlined our ideas for a Women’s Trial Boot Camp.

After a successful inaugural run in May, 2010, we decided to create other programs with the same mission in mind.  We also wanted to invite other teachers with whom we enjoyed working in the past and who we believe share the same thoughts, ideas and feelings about teaching (Lynne, Carl Bettinger and Charlie Abourezk) to join us.  We did not and do not intend to be a traditional provider of programs for trial lawyers or for women only. Our ideas, beliefs and vision are much broader. And men are more than welcome at all of our programs, with the exception of the Women’s Trial Boot Camp.

“Garcia-Colson, Sison, and Peckham intelligibly meld psychodrama and trial skills in an easily understandable book. As a pioneer in psychodramatic trial consulting, I highly recommend this book to lawyers and psychodramatists alike. J. L. Moreno would be pleased.” —John Nolte, Ph.D., clinical psychologist and trial consultant

It’s hard to imagine that we embarked on this great journey from a fun, playful conversation.  But that’s the nature of spontaneity and creativity.  We missed teaching together.   We wanted to do something different, something that was collaborative, receptive and adaptive.  We wanted to meet interesting and interested people.  We’ve accomplished a great deal this year—–2 programs, and coming next month, a book.

We wrote the book because we wanted to reach more people who were interested in being better lawyers for clients and to help them learn to master the tools of psychodrama.  We wished to keep the dream of Jacob Moreno, the father of psychodrama, alive.  The book’s name is Trial in Action: The Persuasive Power of Psychodrama.  It is being published by Trial Guides.  We are extremely proud of it, as it will expose psychodrama to a wider audience.  Check out the book and reviews at: http://www.trialguides.com/book/trial-in-action/

Because of how well our 2010 programs have been received, we have four (4) programs planned for 2011:

  • Trial in Action: The Persuasive Power of Psychodrama – Feb. 17-20 –  New Orleans, LA

  • Second Annual Women’s Trial Boot Camp – May 12-15  – Palm Springs, CA

  • The Art of Telling Our Clients’ Story – Aug. 11-14 – Portland, OR

  • Trial Intensive: Voir Dire and Group Formation – Oct. 20-23 – Palm Springs, CA

In addition to Lynne, Carl and Charlie, who will be faculty for one or more of the programs above, John Nolte will be our special guest at the New Orleans seminar.  Details about all of our programs and testimonials from participants can be found on our web site at http://www.the3sisters.org.

The Faculty for - The Art of Telling Our Clients' Stories (from left) Fredilyn Sison, Charlie Abourezk, Mary Peckham, Carl Bettinger, Joane Garcia-Colson

Our partnership is still is in its infancy. But we are filled with excitement and enthusiasm, and we love working with all the people we’ve met.  It’s been great collaborating with each other.  It’s nice to be teaching with old friends once again.  We have so many people to thank—those who supported us during tough times and those who have joined our journey, because we wouldn’t be here without them.  It’s been a spectacular year, and we are grateful for everything that has happened.  We look forward to next year!

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300 Miles in Five Days: Fighting Fifty Part II

November 12, 2010

I didn’t sleep much the night before the big ride. For some reason, I was nervous and anxious. Would I be able to ride high mileage for several days in a row? Had I trained enough? Would I make it? And yet, I was also excited. I was about to embark on a new adventure.

After dressing in my riding clothes early the morning of our departure, I checked my panniers and double-checked them, making sure I had packed enough energy gel, energy bars and snacks for munching on the road. I loaded my bicycle with lightly packed panniers onto the bike rack of the car and woke my wife to drive me across town to the Starbucks where we were to meet my riding companion. Our plan was to start our ride from a Starbucks midway between our homes. It was 6:00 a.m. We would be on the road in an hour.

I had mapped our trip via google maps which offers a bicycle route feature. The first day we would ride from La Quinta, CA to Brawley, CA, approximately 85 miles of mostly flat terrain, with some very slight climbs. I had never ridden this far and hoped I would finish without being completely spent. I clipped a 3×5 index card to my handle bar bag that had our route, turn by turn.

After coffee, a high carb breakfast and hugs goodbye, we set off from Starbucks with two friends in tow who rode the first few miles with us. The first part of our journey was on side streets with low traffic. We travelled through neighborhoods I hadn’t visited before and entered the rural area flush with date farms. I felt strong.  We conversed about all sorts of things as we rode. So far so good.

My brother-in-law served as SAG support. He would drive the route and stop periodically to provide us with water, snacks and the like and to encourage us on. Every ten miles or so we would see him by the side of the rode and stop for a few minutes, refilling water bottles if necessary, making adjustments to our bikes as needed and stretching our legs.

My sister-in-law (who is 66 years young) planned to only ride part of each day, as much as her energy and stamina permitted. She would start each morning with me, stop when tired and possibly resume riding the latter part of the day.

After about 20 – 25 miles, my sister-in-law decided to take a break and joined her husband in the SAG vehicle. I was now on my own. As the miles ridden mounted up, my energy started to lag. And now I was on the part of our route that included some long, slight inclines. A 2% grade doesn’t sound like much, but on a heavy touring bike with loaded panniers, it feels steep and never ending. By the time I broke for lunch, I was only about half-way to Brawley. And I was low on energy. I needed to stretch my legs and re-fuel.

The last 15-20 miles were very challenging. My sister-in-law rejoined me and we rode triumphantly into Brawley, arriving about 2:30 p.m. We checked into the local Best Western, enjoyed hot showers and took short naps. That night we went to dinner at a local Italian restaurant to carbo load for the next day, a day I knew would be hell on two wheels. (If you are ever tempted to eat at an Italian restaurant owned, run by, and completely staffed with asian people, go to a different restaurant!)

In planning this trip, I knew that the second day would be the hardest day of the ride. We would be travelling from Brawley to the Yuma, AZ area on back roads that took us through some very hilly terrain through Glamis, a recreational haven for ATV’s, rails, dune buggies and off road motorcycles. The ride traversed rolling hills with some very steep inclines and some long gradual inclines. The surrounding landscape was comprised of mostly desert terrain, no large trees, no shade and a lot of sand dunes. So in addition to challenging terrain, it would be hot.

I knew the day would be tough when I didn’t sleep well the night before and when I had low energy at the start of the ride. My speed was 3 miles per hour slower than the day before. Maybe this was normal for a second day and after riding 85 miles. I pushed myself to pedal on. After about 20 miles, my sister-in-law once again took her mid-day break and converted from riding companion to SAG support. I was on my own for the most difficult part of the ride, rolling hills that seemed never to end and felt to my legs like the Swiss Alps.  If I thought the first day was hard, it was a piece of cake compared to this second day. I was tired, I was hot, and I was in pain. I pedaled on, albeit slowly. Again, my riding companion joined me for the last 15-20 miles. The second day’s total was over 65 miles. I had made it.

Once arriving at the hotel, ice on my tired and sore legs was the first order of business. I tried to take a cold ice bath but couldn’t tolerate the cold on my feet. After icing my legs, I slathered arnica on my sore muscles and Desitin on my chaffed rear end. My sore behind made the aching legs feel like nothing. I was happy I survived day two.

We ate another carbo rich dinner at Olive Garden and splurged on Cold Stone for dessert. I had burned over 4,000 calories each day so had no guilt about this indulgence. Day two was now in the record book.

I slept like a rock that night and awoke the next morning feeling great. Yes, my legs were sore, but it was a good soreness. We drove the car outside of Yuma and unloaded our bikes at the first rest stop. We had a light tail wind that would help push us on. Today was our first day riding on the shoulder of the interstate – I-8. I was a little nervous about this but it was the only viable route for day three. We had decided not to ride the entire way to Gila Bend as it was around 120 miles. So, the plan was to ride at least 60 miles.

Day three was incredible! I felt great all day. My speed was excellent and my legs felt good. Even my rear end was somewhat better. I had plenty of energy. I felt so good at 60 miles that I decided to ride on. Total for day three, 75 miles! Reward – a chocolate dipped cone at Dairy Queen in Gila Bend, AZ.

Because lodging options were so slim in Gila Bend, we drove on to Maricopa, AZ outside of Phoenix and stayed at the Ak-Chin Harrah’s Casino resort. My room was incredible! My sleep was not. My legs ached all night and made it hard for me to sleep. Ice didn’t help, arnica didn’t help, even ibufpropen didn’t help. The fourth day was to be a fairly short mileage day. I was going to spend the night at my sisters in San Tan Valley, on the south side of Phoenix. 50 miles and I could rest. At about 20 miles into the ride, it was time for my sister and brother-in-law to leave me and return to Palm Springs. Previous commitments precluded them from completing the trip. I was in civilization at this point and had no qualms about riding the rest of the way alone. In fact, one of the things I like about riding is being alone with my thoughts. Riding is meditative to me. It renews my spirit.

The night before I added about 15-25 pounds to my panniers. Since I would finish the ride on my own without SAG support, I had to pack all my personal belongings that I would need for the next several days in my panniers. I was fully loaded down. It is unbelievable how this extra weight dramatically increased the effort it took to ride. Although I only rode 50 miles on day four, it felt like 100. One of my mistakes, not having enough coffee that morning! I arrived at my sisters simply exhausted. After showering I laid on the couch to take a nap until everyone got home. Despite my throbbing legs and sore hindquarters, I managed to sleep. One more day to go.

I woke early for the final day of my journey. My sister assured me that there was a Starbucks only about 4-5 miles from her house so my plan was to fuel up there, coffee and breakfast. I could make it 4-5 miles. Unfortunately, she was wrong. It was nearly 8 miles to Starbucks. Under normal circumstances, that wouldn’t have been a problem. But on a touring bike, with fully loaded panniers, after having already ridden about 270 miles, it is a long, long way to ride.

But make it I eventually did. I think that was the best iced coffee I have ever had. I also had an Egg McMuffin (minus the meat) at McDonalds and a blueberry scone. I needed fuel.

The plan was for my mom to meet me outside of Florence, AZ to provide SAG support. I would ride as much and as far as I could on this last day. Unbeknownst to me, the ride from Florence, AZ to Tucson was a long steady incline that eventually turned into rolling hills. And I do mean long. It might not have been steep but it was an incline and a very long one with little breaks in the climbing. Without a load, it probably would have felt like nothing. But hauling all that weight, plus my body weight up the long incline was draining.

After much internal struggle, I decided to stop after my total mileage for the trip reached 300 miles. My legs were aching and my knee began to hurt. Although part of me felt like that would be giving up, another part of me knew that riding a bicycle 300 miles in five days was an accomplishment that few have achieved. I finally made peace with the voice inside me that kept saying “You are a failure if you quit.” Riding 300 miles on a bike is not failing. I was content.

When I reached the 300 mile mark, I dismounted and loaded my bike and belongings into the truck my mother was driving. I had made it. I had just spent the last 5 days riding through the desert on a bicycle. How many people can say they have done that?

Some have asked me if I would do a long bicycle ride again. I can honestly say yes. Yes, I would. This was a great experience for me. I saw incredible scenery and a part of the country I have driven through on numerous occasions in a new way. I challenged myself physically and succeeded. I tested my resolve and commitment. And I connected with my spirit and soul.

Maybe, just maybe, turning fifty isn’t that bad.

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Fighting Fifty

November 5, 2010

I am turning 50 in a few short weeks. That number, 50, seems so huge to me. I don’t feel 50 and I certainly don’t want to be 50. But the reality is that I can’t prevent this birthday from coming. I didn’t have any trouble turning 30 or even 40. But the prospect of being 50 has really thrown me for a loop.

For most of this year, my 50th year, I have been rebelling against crossing the threshold into my 50’s. About 7 months ago I came up with a plan to prove to myself that 50 isn’t old, that I am still young enough to accomplish physical feats of endurance.  I also decided to make additional changes to my diet. I might not be able to prevent growing older, but I can live in a way that allows me to live better and to be healthier.

I gave up all red meat 4 years ago, becoming a semi-vegetarian, and only eating limited amounts of fish and chicken. Earlier this year, as part of my anti-aging campaign, I decided to give up all animal products, including eggs and dairy. I also added more grains to my diet. The transition to a vegan diet wasn’t as hard as I had imagined. I enjoy cooking and found many great vegan recipes to experiment with. Now and again I do indulge in some dairy, particularly by adding non-fat milk with a splash of half-and-half to my coffee. But because I have hypothyroidism I can’t eat or drink large amounts of soy. I can honestly say I don’t miss meat.

Some may scoff at these dietary changes but the impact on my health has been quite remarkable. I have more energy, sleep better, and generally feel better. My skin and hair are softer. And I have not gotten a cold or the flu since changing my diet.

In addition to these dietary changes, I came up with a plan to accomplish something big athletically. Initially, I thought climbing a mountain would be quite an accomplishment as well as a physical challenge. I can’t afford to climb Mount Everest (and don’t have any serious climbing experience that would make this a realistic option) and couldn’t convince any of my friends to join me on a trek to base camp or on a guided climb to the summit of Mount Rainier.  So, I came up with a plan to ride my bicycle from Palm Springs, California to Tucson, Arizona. Yes, I did say a bicycle! And I knew just the person to join me on this adventure – my sister-in-law.

I had no trouble convincing my sister-in-law to ride 300 plus miles on a bicycle. After all, she has been an avid cyclist for at least a decade if not more. At 66, she is in great shape, rides 3 times a week and takes very good care of herself. I broached the subject with an email “Do you have any interest in a long bike trip, say a ride from Palm Springs to Tucson?” She responded enthusiastically to my invitation. “Definitely!” And so, I had a companion for my adventure. Serious training needed to be undertaken.

This past spring we talked about our training needs. Our goal; work up to riding about 200 miles a week. No easy task. If you ride between 12-15 miles per hour, that meant training 13-17 hours per week on the bike. And given that we would ride close to 90 miles on some days on our trip, we needed to build in several very long training rides.

Some of you might be thinking, “hey, no problem, it’s just riding a bike.” Oh, if it were only that simple.  Although riding a bike is a non-weight bearing activity, it requires a lot of leg strength and endurance. Not to mention the discomfort of your hindquarters from sitting on a bike saddle for long stretches of time. I slowly built my training distance and in a few months was regularly riding 30-40 miles per ride. Eventually, I added a long 50-mile ride to my weekly training. In the weeks immediately preceding our trek, I did a long, grueling 70-mile ride over hilly terrain. That was the most challenging and exhausting physical activity I had done up to that point in my life. I was drained from this ride, both physically and mentally. But I made it! I was wiped out the next day and my derriere was chaffed and sore. I began to doubt my ability to complete this trip. Would I make it? Could I really ride 80+ miles in one day and still have energy to ride the next day? I began to doubt myself. And to question the wisdom of embarking on such an adventure.

The week before the trip, my anxiety surged. I was nervous and anxious about stringing together back-to-back high mileage rides several days in a row. How was I going to do this? Would I make it?

To be continued. . .